The Jungle’s Favorite Tweets

One of the craziest tweets I’ve ever seen – the one that came from @Twitter that said,  it turned 10 years old yesterday.

How the hell is Twitter already a decade old? UFC 197, Super Bowl 50, WrestleMania 32 and the IPhone turning 9 can’t believe Twitter is 10.

And I can’t believe Peter Carroll used its birthday to drop the corniest tweet in its history. “Happy 10th birthday Twitter! Look how far you’ve come! Remembering when there was ‘a new thing called Twitter that we should check out’!” Ugh. Thanks Granny.

Remembering when you were a fiery young coach everybody should check out! But I can’t let Peter spoil the fun. Because even if it’s evil sometimes, or a LOT of the time… Twitter HAS been a lot of fun.

So in no particular order, here’s a look back and a tip of the cap to the Jungle’s favorite tweets from sports figures.

Antonio Cromartie is in, because Cro was one of the first to go really strong with an athlete-on-athlete blast. How strong? Back in 2011 during labor negotiations when Matt Hasselbeck asked if Cro could even spell “CBA”… Cro tweeted back “hey Matt if you have something to say then say it be a man about it. Don’t erase it. I will smash ur face in.” Still stands up. Still incredible.

He was a forefather for guys like Pittsburgh Steeler Vince Williams who was angry with Vontaze Burfict: “I catch Vontaze on south beach im painting that boi on sight 100.”

It’s not all violence of course. A’s Reliever Brandon McCarthy is a twitter legend, and after he got a fractured skull from a line drive to the head, he emerged from the hospital and tweeted this. “WELL IF BEING DISCHARGED FROM THE HOSPITAL ISNT THE BEST TIME TO ASK ABOUT A THREESOME THEN IM FRESH OUT OF IDEAS”

And finally- this may go over terribly in Green Bay, but two of my favorite all time tweets came from the Fail Mary. One raw anger, one pure genius. The Packers get badly jobbed out of a win by a ridiculous call from the replacement refs, and lineman T.J. Lang tweets: “Fuck the NFL… Fine me and use the money to pay the regular refs.”

At that point- it shattered every retweet record. And was only broken eventually by Bieber. It has 87k as of this morning. And Lang was never fined for it.

But still… My favorite tweet came from the same game, but a different dude. Former Packers tight end Tom Crabtree, putting the frustration of that loss into perspective. “Imagine you make a painting. It isn’t perfect by others’ standards, but it’s your painting. You are proud. Then somebody takes a shit on it.” Amazing.

I still laugh every time I read it. If only there could be more tweets like that, and less Twitter bullying, racism, death threats, and the 24/7 ability to harass public figures.

Twitter is not a perfect painting. But these tweets are some of the best colors on it. Now it’s just a matter of seeing if you’re still around at Number 20, big dog.


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