Get Your Life Together, Bro

Johnny Manziel says he’s living with Von Miller and working hard to get his life together. In a vacuum, it’s exactly the kind of message we’ve been waiting for from Manziel for 2 years now. But it falls a tad flat when that message is rambled to a TMZer outside of a Hollywood club from a dude who sounds like he’s drunk. It’s why video rules the world. Because if an NFL GM just heard the message, they’d think maybe we should give Manziel a call. But see him spitting it on a sidewalk, and they’d delete his contact.

Bro, can you imagine an NFL team wanting that bro to lead their offense, bro? The kind of guy who goes to the same club 5-6 nights in a row, bro. Never mind leading the offense, that guy isn’t getting on a team, bro. Especially, bro, given the legal issues he has off the field, bro. 5-6 nights in a row, bro? An actual NFL quarterback wouldn’t’ go to the same club 6 times in a YEAR, bro. I don’t for sure know that Manziel was drunk talking to that TMZer. But I know this – fellow Heisman winner Troy Smith thinks he sounds pretty officer. And there’s nobody who could watch that and think he’s ready to be a professional football player. “Does the party ever stop…? Are we partying tonight?” – You’re going to a nightclub, John. What else are you going to do in there, work out and read? in Denver reports that Manziel and Miller aren’t even living together. So basically Johnny is just out there on the party circuit, living one big party, and maybe even lying to the cameras. With every new Manziel video, you ask yourself – is this the most pathetic one yet? And Bro, once again, the answer is yes.

My favorite part of that video may have been when he said, “We’re getting our lives together, bro.” Bro, Von Miller has already gotten his life together. He’s the best player on the best team in the NFL. You on the other hand are in a gutter. Although I have no idea why he’d want to exert the injury necessary to try to save you, but you really need to keep his name out your mouth. Because comparing your trainwreck life to his Super Bowl winning life is a really ignorant thing to do. Even for you, Billy. Almost as dumb as him saying NFL teams don’t have any issue with him partying. Trust me, they do. Your career has hanging by a thread, if it’s not over already, and you don’t even know it. Look man, if you’re all about the Club Life; that’s fine. Your life. Just stop the rest of us you want to play football, because obviously, you don’t.


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