September is here. It’s the Thursday before Labor Day weekend and that can only mean one thing…

FOOTBALL IS BACK. Well, college football.

And yes, technically the season started last week with Cal playing Hawaii in Australia, but two things about that: one, it was in Australia. And two, it was a hideous game.

But tonight, it’s back. And yes, the matchups aren’t that great. But are you really going to complain. After wandering through the desert, someone’s just handed you a glass of water, are you going to send it back because it doesn’t have ice?

Your opener is Bob Diaco and UConn against Maine at 7pm Eastern. You know Diaco’s going to be firing up his guys with stories of werewolves, vampires, Batman, and fish cakes. No way they come out flat against the Black Bears.

Half an hour later, you get the kickoff of Appalachian State against #9 Tennessee. I’d say that’s a walkover, except Michigan fans know what can happen when App State comes to your house.

But the big question is: is this the year Tennessee finally lives up to the hype? Spoiler alert: no. Not if the past is any guide. Don’t get me wrong. There’s a ton of talent on that roster. But nobody has a higher ratio of offseason hype to mid-season letdown than the Vols. Those guys get a ton of run in the offseason and then when the games actually start, they’re nowhere to be found.

Half an hour after that, you’ve got Vandy hosting South Carolina and as weird as it was to see Steve Spurrier on the Gamecocks sideline for a season opener for the first time, it’s going to be even weirder to see him not on the sideline now. And weirder still to see Will Muschamp in his place.

And by the time 8pm rolls around, everything’s in full swing. From local rivalries like Southern Utah at Utah and Weber State v. Utah State, to really strange matchups like Rice at Western Kentucky and later Oregon State v. Minnesota.

And while this is a solid feast of football, it’s really just the appetizer.
Tomorrow, Stanford and Michigan State both start their seasons, and then Saturday, it’s time to park yourself on the couch because Georgia Tech v. BC kicks off in Ireland at 7:30 on the East Coast and 4:30 on the West Coast. And from there, we’re just mainlining football for roughly 20 straight hours including:

• OU and Houston, Boomer Sooner v. H-Town Takeover
• Josh Rosen and UCLA at Texas A&M
• LSU v. Wisconsin in Lambeau Field
• A Mark Richt-less Georgia vs. North Carolina
• USC vs. #1 Alabama in Jerry World. The battle of the t-shirts: Roll Tears Roll vs. “Our OJ only killed Clemson.” If the game is half as good as the gear, we’re in for a treat.
• And #2 Clemson at Auburn

Bottom line: how are you going to pull this off? Five freaking days of football. If you’ve got a wife, a kid, some yard work to do? How do you work that? Because this weekend is ridiculous. Because you can literally flip the TV on tonight and… Not turn it off until Midnight on Monday and there should be a football flying the entire time.

I know you’re hyped. But you’ve got to be strategic… In other words, make a plan. Because failing to plan is planning to fail. College football is back and you better be too.


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