Celebrity baby announcements generally don’t ding my radar. Check that—they do. But they don’t make the show.
Because, why would they? I’m not about to take a run at anyone for having a kid or starting a family. And I usually don’t care enough to swerve out of my way to congratulate anyone. Because people have kids. That’s what they do. Just ask Alvie.
But when Derek “Gift Basket In The Car” Jeter is about to become a dad—it’s worth bringing up—if only for a minute or two.
First off, good for Jeets. He’s married to a super model, half his age in Hannah Davis. And he’s got a world famous ex-girlfriend list. Good for this guy to make the rounds before checking into fatherhood. Can’t fault a guy for getting it out of his system. And better to do that before a marriage than during a marriage.
And let’s be crystal clear about this: Jeets becoming a dad is newsworthy because of his legendary past. I’m not the only one thinking that right now. He’s a rock star with the ladies and so settling down into dad life is unexpected. Not bad. It’s awesome. The Best thing every. But in his case, just unexpected.
But the announcement is a little suspect. Of course, the news came from Hannah, because the next bit of personal information Jeets gives out will be the first. And where do you think she parked that announcement? On the freaking Player’s Tribune, of course! Where else would you exploit the news of your pregnancy for page views?
I love knowing that a conversation took place where Jeets probably told Hannah that she’d couldn’t Instagram it like Beyoncé—but he would allow her to write up a column for his website. Just the way she dreamed it, I’m sure. And if there were any grammatical errors, she didn’t need to worry. Blake Griffin is one of the many editors listed on the site.
Here’s the absolute best part of the announcement: “We want our kids’ lives to be as “normal” as possible. They’re going to be born into such an extraordinary situation. They’re going to have to be some strong little people. We don’t want them to be defined by their dad’s name — for them, we want him to just be “Dad.””
Nothing says normal like an announcement on Dad’s website. But seriously, I get the sentiment. And I hope the Jeter’s get what they want in having normal kids. I’d say the first step would be cutting the internet when they’re old enough to click around. But who am I to give unsolicited parenting advice? You don’t tell me how to raise my kids and I won’t tell you how to raise yours, right. But best of luck raising quote normal in that household. Especially when normal is announcing their arrival on a sports website owned and operated by your husband.
Jeets is spectacular. This dude is a magician. He could go an entire Hall of Fame career without every telling anyone anything about himself. Yet, fire up a nice website, where he gets all sorts of famous athletes to let us all in and tells us everything we could ever hope to know about them. Sort of like the former athlete who was an ingrate his entire career, and boorish with the media, only to take a job in a studio, as a talking head and member of the media once he’s done playing. Yeah, Jeets!