A-Fraud’s Game Prep

A-Rod hit the broadcast booth for the first time last night. He called Royals-Yankees for FS1 and they hyped the hell out of it. Including a pre-game pic of the prep from the booth.

The pic included, Kevin Burkhardt, A-Rod… aaaaand A-Rod’s game notebook. In the notebook, the word “Child” was written down and underlined… and immediately below that were three bullet points:

— Birth control

— Baby

— Pull out stuff

It’s like a bad Matt in Cleveland call…. Uhhhhh… global warming… birth control… Kirstie Alley… pull-out stuff.

Look, the Internet is an undefeated, un-scored upon goalie. You’re not slipping anything past it and into the net. There are eyes everywhere and every little detail will be caught. If you have a loose thread on the lapel of your suit, the Internet will find it and roast you for it. That’s just how it goes. So peek before you post. Attention to detail.

That’s a lesson for everyone. Especially A-Rod. One step forward. Two steps back. Right when you think you can trust this guy; and he really has done the hard work on himself, and his image makeover was nearly complete, dude shows up in his first broadcast booth; prepped and ready. He’s done his homework. Too bad it was his, how NOT to end up on Maury homework!

Baggy as he ever was. Dude, are you broadcasting a major league baseball game or teaching 7th grade health class?

For this guy’s sake, he better hope it was a prank. And that someone was messing with him and wrote it in the book as a joke. You know, like one of the fellas was pimping him.  Then again, what are the chances of that happening. He’s not of the boys, and it absolutely seems like something he’d write in his journal.

Damn, Alex. You really had us. I really was starting to think that you’re the one dude who really could change. The one dude who could really get us to look at you in a different light. But with just one journal post, it all comes rushing back. Getting fake baked and lying on national television. Cheating. Marking your spot at cousin Yuri’s house. Yelling HA!!! At an infielder trying to catch a pop up.  And trying to knock the ball out of  Bronson Arroyo’s glove.  I’ll give you this; you had us all going for a minute. It almost worked. Next time, remember that eye in the sky. On the internet, someone is always watching, and if you say or do or write something stupid, or write about birth control and quote, pull out stuff, it will go viral before you can erase it, because the internet is ink and you can’t erase it or liquid paper it or bleach it, it’s there forever.

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