Awful Take, Aqib

In the aftermath of the Warriors second title in three years, there were a lot of terrible takes flying around. Ones about how Kevin Durant was a gravy-trainer and that his ring is tarnished. Or how LeBron isn’t that great because he lost in the Finals again. Both of which are total garbage.

But of all the terrible takes, the worst had to be the ones coming from Aqib Talib. Yes, the Broncos cornerback, Cleveland native, and Cavs honk, couldn’t wait to hop on Twitter after it was over and thumb out some of the strangest tweets ever, starting with this one: ‘Congrats @Cavs! Boys gotta join forces to see us! @kingjames can bring whoever he want to the Land! Let’s link up then!!! #suckachip2017’

I guess I see him working there. He’s just trying to hype the Cavs and cheer them up after losing by pointing out that the Warriors brought in Durant after they lost last year. I guess that makes sense. Sort of. Kind of. Maybe. But hashtag “suckachip2017”?!?! Like this championship is actually a “suck-a-chip” because they signed a free agent? That makes zero sense at all. But Aqib was just getting started.

Because here comes the fire: ‘Kerr wouldn’t even be a head coach without Jordan!!! #coat tail boys!!!’

Boom! Roasted! Take that for data! Actually, no, don’t. Because what the hell does that even mean?

Are you trying to say that Michael Jordan is the reason that Steve Kerr has gone to the Finals every season he’s been a head coach and won two rings in three years? If that was the case, Randy Brown would be stacking rings as an assistant in Chicago. And Bill Cartwright wouldn’t have been canned after 151 games as head coach of the Bulls.

But I’m sure Aqib’s right about that. I’m sure it has nothing to do with the fact that Kerr played under three of the best coaches in basketball history, Lute Olsen, Phil Jackson, and Gregg Popovich, and that he’s brilliant and has been a successful player, analyst, general manager, and now a head coach. I’m sure none of that has anything to do with Kerr himself and is all a reflection of playing alongside Jordan.

And Talib wasn’t done yet. He had some of the venom for Durant as well ‘@kdtrey5 u a suburban kid!!! Link up with the best to chip!!! HOF laughing at you right now!!!’

Yes, I’m sure the Hall of Fame is laughing at the 8-time all-star, 4-time scoring champion, NBA champion, Finals MVP, League MVP, 2-time Olympic gold medalist and one of the greatest to ever play the game. But even worse than that take is the source of that take.

Is this the same Aqib Talib who used to be a New England Patriot? The same Aqib Talib who was on the Patriots team that lost to the Broncos in the AFC championship at the end of the 2013 season? And then signed with the Broncos two months later? The same Broncos who had just gone to the Super Bowl?

I haven’t seen Aqib shoot himself in the leg like that since he, well, shot himself in the leg. HEY-O!

And then he threw in one more bad tweet for good measure: ‘And I checked yo brother like 2012 cuz I knew it was hospital cotton in yo blood!!! #suckachip2017!!!’

I’m assuming that was directed at Durant, but honestly, I have no idea what or who he’s talking about.

Is he saying that he guarded Durant’s brother five years ago and that told him that Durant was soft? That makes about as much sense as the hashtag suck-a-chip.

I always say, have a take and don’t suck. But unfortunately, Aqib has a take and his suck-a-chip takes suck.

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