The Summer Of Lucky Whitehead

Lucky Whitehead continues to be off-season’s weirdest story and it just keeps getting weirder, previously on “The Summer of Lucky Whitehead,” we learned that Rodney “Lucky” Whitehead had been charged in a Virginia shoplifting case and there was a warrant out for his arrest.

In the wake of that news, the Cowboys released him. But, in a dramatic plot twist, it turned out that Whitehead was incorrectly charged and that the real shoplifter was someone who claimed to be Lucky Whitehead, but really wasn’t Lucky Whitehead. FREAKING DRAMA!

But the Cowboys didn’t change their decision and Whitehead was understandably irritated. He told the Dallas Morning News: “Let’s not sugarcoat anything. I was pretty much being called a liar.”

Granted it is pretty crazy that someone was arrested for shoplifting, pretended to be Lucky Whitehead and the police in Virginia believed it. And the Cowboys acted on it. But Rodney feels like the team never helped him out: “As far as the whole situation went down, I was blindsided. I didn’t know about a warrant that came about in the first place. Clearly because I wasn’t the person arrested. The head person [in the Cowboys organization] I told, no one backed me up. No one had my back in the whole situation. I knew about it at what? 12:45. By 2:30 I’m released.” 

So then came Jason Garrett’s press conference. Finally, we were going to get some answers about what was going with this whole situation. Or not. Let’s just say Jason Garrett’s interest in answering questions about Lucky Whitehead were lower than a crippled cricket’s ass.

He lasted three minutes at the press conference, but what a press conference it was. Here are the highlights.

That repeated answer would have been good if the questions were: when did you make the decision? Yesterday we made a decision that we deemed to be in the best interest of the Dallas Cowboys. We’re standing by that decision and we’re going to move on.”

Or, Coach, did you deem that decision to be in the best interest of the Dallas Cowboys? “Yesterday we made a decision that we deemed to be in the best interest of the Dallas Cowboys. We’re standing by that decision and we’re going to move on.”

Except those weren’t the questions. But he just kept repeating that statement over and over again.

Did you catch the one reporter asking: “Do you have some people working for the Dallas Cowboys that are just too stupid to work for this team?”

STRAIGHT FREAKING FIRE. That’s bringing the heat, Bobby Ramos Bottom Line style.

But even that wouldn’t rattle Garrett. He had his answer and he was sticking to it, no matter what.

Forget the comparisons to Marshawn and Belichick, Garrett skipped over them and went straight to Rasheed Wallace’s epic “both teams played hard” presser from back in the day.

Except at least Rasheed’s answer was fun. This was just boring and stupid.

I get that you don’t want to talk about cutting Rodney Whitehead, but when you cut a guy for being arrested and it turns out that it was a mistake, you kind of have to talk about it. And I know that he wanted to keep repeating that the team made the decision, but if they made the decision with the wrong information, well, what do you do then? Repeating the same answer isn’t good enough. Not only not good enough, but completely lame.  Embarrassing.  And insulting.

Jerry Jones also took a moment for the media and that was even weirder than Garrett.

Uhhh, what exactly are you talking about? I know that in the past Jerrah and the Cowboys have backed guys up and they’re doing it right now with a number of guys on that roster, no names mentioned, rhymes with Bezekiel Belliott, but they didn’t back Whitehead to a fault. They didn’t even come close. Instead, they canned him for something that he didn’t even do. And then didn’t want to explain it.

Listen… I’m not looking  to circumcise a mosquito here, but this isn’t on the media. The media didn’t cut Whitehead. The team did. And then didn’t want to own it when they got it wrong. Teams want players to own up to mistakes, but when they make one of their own, they really don’t want to talk about it.

And if the argument was that getting rid of Whitehead wasn’t really about this, it was about other things, then he should’ve been released when other things happened. It can’t be the final straw if the final straw never happened. You made a mistake. Admit it. Own it. And then we’ll all move on. We’ll all forgive the mistake. As long as you own it. And they haven’t.

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