Lights. Camera. CUTTY TIME, baby!
Adam Gase confirmed what we all wanted to hear — that Jay Freaking Cutler is going to be behind center for the Dolphins on Thursday night against Baltimore. Get your Popcorn Ready. Get your Marlboro Reds ready. Hell get your cheap whiskey ready, too. Because the ink’s dry on that 10 million dollar deal. And interceptions thrown during the preseason don’t even count on your stat sheet.
Look, for as undesirable as this guy was during the offseason — when the best job offer he got was from Fox to NOT play football– there’s a helluva lot to like about this deal. Experience with Adam Gase, who Cutler played his best football under in Chicago in 2015. A good running game and some young talent at receiver. A defense that can only get better. And he’s not exactly following Dan Marino, it’s just Ryan Tannehill.
And while Cutty has been playing catch-up in South Beach, the early reports are good. Listen to some of the “glowing” reviews his new teammates are giving him: Here’s Byron Maxwell, talking to the MMQB’s Robert Klemko:
“I know what everybody knows. Your first impression is what you see on TV—his teams didn’t win… But when he becomes your teammate you put that aside. It’s solely what he does, not what he’s done. We’re in a time of need, and quarterbacks don’t grow on trees.”
Damn, Byron. I hope you waited until it was dark to take that club to Cutty’s knees in the alley.
And here’s offensive lineman Laremy Tunsil: “I heard all the bad stuff bout Jay, that he doesn’t care, but from the looks of it, he does care. You have to judge people by what you know and observe, not what you hear.”
Look, when Laremy Tunsil — the guy who is like 15 minutes past those gas mask bong rips and stack of cash from Hugh Freeze draft night free fall — when THAT GUY is willing to say that it looks like you care, that’s all that matters.
So maybe Cutty CAN turn over a new leaf. Maybe HE’S the guy who can build on the sneaky-good season that the Dolphins had last year, when they lost 4 of their first 5 but rallied to win 10 games and make the playoffs. And with Jay Ajayi out of concussion protocol and an improved offensive line, Gase doesn’t need the full Cutty Experience, he just needs a guy with a rocket arm and his smoking hot wife to come down to South Beach and manage the offense.
Right guy for that? EHHHHHH. Of course he isn’t. But it’ll be fun as hell to watch anyway.
Trust me, while no one guy is bigger than any one team, and the NFL, despite all it concerns on and off the field is still the biggest thing in the world… the shield is a helluva lot better with Jay Cutler than it is without him.
Cutty’s back and not a second too soon. When I think of the guys that I’d pay good money to see sling it, Aaron Rodgers, Tom Brady, Ben Roethlisberger, Drew Brees, Cam Newton, obviously come to mind. But believe this, Jay Cutler is on the list. Hell, Cutty is at the top of that list.
Welcome back, bro: soak it all in because you don’t know how long it will last; so enjoy every second of it. I know I will.