Brock Lobster Time

For some time in Denver, there’s been a running debate – why exactly was Trevor Siemian still starting and just what would it take for him to lose his gig? And now we have our answer: 3 straight losses, 7 turnovers, and a rating under 65 over that stretch. Apparently that’s just how bad you have to play to get benched.

So, Denver, I have just one question for you: are you ready for Brock Lobster??

Brock Osweiler is back, baby! Cleveland has a new starting quarterback. Well, not exactly. Cleveland is going to be paying Brock Osweiler 900 grand a week to start for Denver. Fantastic.

Cleveland is quickly becoming the epicenter of football. It’s like the Kevin Bacon game, everything that happens in the NFL is six degrees or less away from Cleveland in one way or another. Deshaun Watson is the AFC offensive player of the Month? Cleveland could’ve had him. Carson Wentz is the NFC offensive player of the month? Cleveland could’ve had him, too. AJ McCarron is still in Cincinnati? That’s because of Cleveland. And now the Browns are signing checks to pay Denver’s starting quarterback.

The question in Denver wasn’t really how bad would Siemian have to play to lose his job, the question was how bad would he have to play to lose his job to the Brock Lobster. And now we know the answer: terribly. He would have to be terrible, the team would have to lose three straight games, and the defense would have to be really pissed off. And then, and only then, would the Broncos turn to Osweiler.

When John Elway brought Osweiler back to Denver, he said that he thought that with a little “football rehab,” he’d be ready to play. Does that mean it would take some time to wash the stink of Cleveland off him? Osweiler was asked about football rehab yesterday and he said, “I’m checking out.”

And then went on to say, You would have to ask John exactly what he meant. … I think sometimes the best thing for a quarterback, when he’s not playing well or he’s going through some tough times, is actually pulling him out of the fire and making him the backup … Letting him observe. That’s what I’ve been able to do. Sometimes when you’re in the heat of the moment, you’re just trying to make a play and then you make a bad play worse and then it just compounds, and before you know it, you can’t slow it down.”

Okay, I guess, whatever you say. I’m not really sure what that word salad means, but I do know what this statement from Vance Joseph means: “Brock plays well, he plays next week. It’s very simple.”

It means that Brock is a temporary starter. And yes, I know that in the NFL, nobody owns a position, you just rent it and the rent is due every day, but in Brock’s case, it’s a bit more extreme. Because you have to think the Lobster’s only getting tossed into the pot because Paxton Lynch isn’t healthy or ready yet. And that when he is, Lynch will get a long look.

Will switching to Brock make a difference? Will Denver’s offense be better? I can’t imagine how it would be worse, but then again, this is Brock Osweiler we’re talking about, so anything is possible. Which means we might not have long to enjoy the Lobster tossing the rock around the field and tossing words into a sentence. Enjoy it while you can, Denver. Enjoy it while you can.

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