It’s Tuesday. The Cleveland Browns are coming off their bye, which means that they haven’t played for almost ten days, and yet I could do an entire show on the Browns. Hell this entire show, every day, could be about the Cleveland Browns. And it would probably be better than the show I currently do.
We could talk about the rumors that they’re trying to convince Peyton Manning to join their front office. That’s got to be one hell of a pitch meeting. How do you convince a guy with as many options as Peyton Manning that his best option would be to join the Browns front office? That’s laughable. Then again, the Browns are the ultimate clown show.
Or we could talk about Browns Executive Vice President of Football Operations Sashi Brown denying reports that he intentionally sabotaged the AJ McCarron trade. “That’s wholly untrue. We were all in there together – Hue (Jackson), myself and a couple other staff members that work on these things at the time we were trying to get the trade done so I’m not worried about that internally. Externally, I can just put it to bed that is just not the case. To sabotage a trade just wouldn’t make any sense.”
Sabotaging a trade wouldn’t make sense, but not being able to complete it does? So it wasn’t sabotage, it was just incompetence. We’re not stabbing each other in the back, we just don’t know to do our jobs. That’s gotta make you Browns fans feel better, right?. I could spend a whole week. On just that topic alone. And that’s before we get to the fact that they’re 0-8, halfway to the perfect season.
And as if that wasn’t enough, Josh Gordon is expected to make his return to the Browns facility today. And before that, he made his return to the headlines with the release of an interview that he did with GQ. And the quotes are amazing.
Like the fact that he slammed shots and got high before games. Not just a few games. Every game. Going back to college.
Dude never hit the field without hitting the bottle or bong first, quote: “We would stay at the team hotel, and then players are allowed to go back home, get what they need and then go to the game. So I’d leave the hotel early morning, go home, eat breakfast, do my little ritual, whatever it may be, some weed, some alcohol and then go to the game. And then, I’d definitely be partying after every game, win or lose. Every game.”
How did he manage to pull this off? How was dude able to burn blunts and or slam shots before every single football game: how does that even work? Quote…“I used to make a ritual of it before every game. If I had already been drug tested that week, or the day before the game, I knew I had a couple days to buy to clean my system. Even before I was getting tested for alcohol, prior to my DWI in 2014, I would take the biggest bong rip I could. And try to conceal all the smell off all my clothes. I’d be dressed up to go to the game. A bunch of guys smoke weed before the game. But we’re not talking about them.
I would have these little pre-made shots. I used to love Grand Marnier. I could drink it down smooth. I could usually drink a lot of it. But if it wasn’t that, it might be a whiskey or something. And I would drink probably like half a glass, or a couple shots to try and warm my system up, basically. To get the motor running. That’s what I would do for games.”
And if you’re wondering whether or not he did that before his back-to-back 200 yard receiving games in 2013, the answer is yes. Gordon said that he had something in his system during every game of his career. Including college.
Playing in the NFL is already dangerous. Playing in the NFL drunk or high is insane. And yet he was doing that every day. And the thing is, as crazy as his admission sounds, I’m guessing he wasn’t the first guy to do it and I’m guessing he won’t be the last.
Oh, and C-town, he doesn’t paint you in an especially good light, either: “Living in Cleveland, sometimes it could be a nightmare. I’ve been harassed, had drinks thrown at me. I’ve been [followed] in the grocery store, heckled everywhere. At the games, people harassed and heckled my brothers and my mom. [My] brothers got into fights in the stands. Cars [have] been jumped on. Somebody dented the hood of the car. Had to sue a guy and get the money back ’cause he damaged the car. People are throwing money, pennies, to break the windows. So Cleveland was rough, man.”
I’ll be honest, that might be even more shocking than admitting that he was drinking or smoking before every game. If that’s true, that’s not a good look for you at all, Cleveland.
This isn’t the first time that Gordon has talked openly about his substance abuse problems. He did so a few weeks back in an interview with Uninterrupted. And I’ll be honest. I don’t know what it all means. Has he finally turned over a new leaf? Did this stay in rehab work where the previous ones, ones that he admits were just PR stunts, failed? I don’t know. Is he saying it because he wants to get the hell out of Cleveland? Or is he saying it because it’s part of his recovery, it’s cathartic and he really doesn’t want to succeed? Only time will tell, but I can say that he seems to be saying all the right things. Not the part about playing high and or drunk: but when he talks about the moment where he decided to make a change: “I said, If I plan on having any type of a career, I’ll stop. But at this point I thought, If I want any type of a life, if I wanted to live, [I’ll stop]. It was like: You’re never going back to bleeping work ever, if you can’t figure out how to live. Because at this point in time, the trajectory, you’re going to die. You’re going to kill yourself.”
Again, I’m not an expert. I don’t know Josh Gordon. I don’t know if he’s baring his soul and cleansing himself or if he’s just saying what he thinks people want to hear. I hope it’s the former. And if it is, maybe, just maybe, he’s on the road to turning this whole story around.
Who knows? Is he of right mind and body or is he going to slam jaeger before his next game, assuming there is a next game. Has he turned his life around or are he and Johnny Football going to slam shots of jack before their next CFL game. Hell if I know.
But I know this; shots are not performance enhancing and my man should not be slamming them before rocking a bonnet in an NFL game: why not just get blasted and walk back and forth across the freeway. Pitching a no hitter on acid is one thing, going over the middle on goldshlagger is another.